A Long Haul

Travis, who doesn't like to ask for help, asked me for help. He needed to move a giant desk from his baby room to his attic. The desk was made by his dad when Travis was a fourth-grader. It's huge, with a depth of 32 inches and a top you could sleep on. But it only has legroom for a child. The move reqired us to slide it out of the room, through the front door, around the house to stairs running up the side of the house and into a door opening into the full attic.

I got there after work. To get it out of the nursery, we had to take the door off the hinges. Easily done. No problem. The desk barely slides out of the doorways. Travis then uses a dolly to roll it to the staircase. We get a plank to act as a ramp for the first step, but for the rest, we simply lift it one step at a time until we get to the top platform. Once there, we realize the desk is too wide to go in. Off comes that door. Still won't work. We turn it to the side. Still won't go. We take off the doorjamb. Still won't go. We remove the lock hook rom the other side. Still won't go.

Now this desk is a family treasure. Travis and Kathy can't bring themselves to get rid of it, and she intends to use at least the top part for a new dinner table. But they don't want to simply chop it up because, as they say, it's the only project his dad finished. However, we can't get the thing in the attic. He's sure they carried it out of the attive 20 years ago in one piece. We look at the top; it's obscenely wide for the desk frame and appears to be held on by a series of screws from underneath. We get to removing. Thirty screws later, it seems, hey, the top is actually glued on. We try to angle it inside, one leg at a time. Nope. Still too wide. And at this point, Travis says it's time to cut the crap and dissemble the desk. He runs downstairs to get a power saw. It's too weak to cut the desk, and he has to get the bigger saw. The back is removed, but the desk still won't go. Off comes the top. Then the legs are separated. Now we can carry in the parts and the drawers. This takes two hours.

I get home and refuse to tell Your Sis what happened. They're coming over later for wings and rasslin, and I decide this is his story to tell. a Travis story. A Travis-ty. Poor guy. It's a disatser of a project; everything went wrong. And now he has to reassemble the desk and the upstairs door.

We're taking dinner over there tonigh. Kathy mentioned slyly that we never come over.

Picture of the Day
Topher Grace as Venom in the new Spidey movie. Looks close to the comic version.

In the News
Mental Floss answers the 25 Most Important Questions Ever.

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Condi Rice said today of the Isreal/Hezbollah fighting: "We need to get to a sustainable peace, there must be a way for people to reconcile their differences." This sounds as realistic a stance as "just say no."

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Press Secretary Tony Snow retracted his statement last week that Bush considers embryonic stem-cell use "murder."

Y Tu Rick James Tambien

The very morning I posted about three straight days of leg-killing exercise, I was asked to do more. The office received 100 boxes of the company's history books at 36 pounds a box. That's a ton and a half. The driver announced he was not paid to move them, just deliver them to our door. We carted them up the handicap ramp to the opposite end of the building in about half an hour. My legs are yelling at me in a vulgar leg language. I got home late as we put the final touches on convention stuff and soaked in the tub for about 20 minutes. Didn't help. Friday, I awoke with stiff legs and knees. I have this sensation in my thigh; it feels like my cell phone is vibrating inside my pocket. Yet that gadget sits over there, in my lunchbox on the floor. Weird.

Thursday and Friday were 12-hour workdays as we packed up the office. Only the stunning hotness of my iPod playlist kept me awake enough to drive home. And I’m sure the deer appreciated hearing me warble Air Supply at top volume.

On Saturday, we hit Asheville. Your Sis got some new shoes at Topps. We strolled a bit, taking in some art galleries and eating at the Woolworth Diner where a grilled cheese and BLT set you back $12. As we moved from the Grove Arcade to Malaprops, Asheville was hit by a monsoon, a true-blue gullywasher that stopped the city cold for 15 minutes. An hour later, you couldn’t even tell it rained. It was brutal hot. I looked at making my own painting canvas instead of buying a giant one pre-made. It’ll be cheaper to craft it, and I won’t have to strap the readymade on to my car roof to drive it home. We got back in time for supper and Kathy and Travis stopped by to shoot the shit. Somehow this turned into us watching my Dave Chappelle DVDs, and Your Sis actually laughed.

On Sunday, she was struck by the notion of taking apart her bathtub doors and putting up the shower curtain. This became an Official project. We had to scour the old caulk off the tub, shave the wall anchors down, pull up the floor stripping, and fill in holes in the fiberglass. We need to adhere the linoleum to the floor before adding new stripping and patch a gouge. Then she can use it again. That probably won’t happen before I leave for Orlando on Thursday. We ended the night watching Y Tu Mama Tambien, the first film we taped on TiFaux back in January. It’s a very well-directed movie, with prolonged shots and nice character movement. I like the storytelling, although the narration style reminds me a lot of City of God. It’s also possibly the most realistic depiction of teen boys I’ve seen onscreen.

Picture of the Day
The largest North American comic convention just wrapped up. Some costumes are great. Others ...


In the News
Condi Rice went to Beirut today to talk to the leader of Lebanon, presumably to assure him the U.S. will extend evacuations of his people if he can find some oil. We're also speeding up arms shipments to Israel for use in the Hezbollah attacks. The administration wants to pressure Syria to cut off Hezbollah but sent Rice to Lebanon. I don't see how that pressure Syria to do anything.

Tender is the Night and My Legs

Monday, I ran. Tuesday, I mowed. Wednesday, I bowled. Today, I got the ouchies. Your Sis hosted a Ladies Night with a Mediterranean theme. The shindig was on before I got home from work. She had balloons on the maibox and back deck and a spread of food guests had brought. I helped her make picture coasters relating to countries on the ocean. She hosted about ten fellow teachers while I vanished for the bowling alley. Travis and I went four games, including a break for fries and beer. We talked marriage and arguments and my divorce. It was good. Very good. This is a good guy all around, and we think the world of his wife too. We lucked up finding these folks. When I got home, I helped clean up as Heidi said goodbye to Kathy. We're supposed to start boxing up the office for the Orlando convention today, but we're doing an awful lot of last-minute printing. I don't know when I'll get home tonight; some were here into the wee hours yesterday.

Picture of the Day
Stephen Hawking wins at Snaps.





In the News
"Snowflake babies" is the new cuddly-wuddly name for children born fromdiscarded embryo collections. The hardline GOP used the term in teh recent stem-cell debate which culminated in Bush's only veto of his administration.

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Virtually all the significant critics hate Lady in the Water. Look for small-market and fringe critics to laud it so their quotes can appear in national ads. This is their form of cheap publicity.

One Million Degrees

Of course, summer is hot. It's always hot. But we've had some intense dry-heat hot for days now. The sun, she is a'blazing. I mowed the yard yesterday at 7 p.m., and it was still strapping on a heat lamp. Just as I finished, my pal Esther called to give me details of her recent delivery. I don't think I've talked to her since Christmas when she announced she was pregnant. We watched "House" over a late dinner and toyed about with our new exercise tool, a giant inflatable ball. Yes, it does help you work the torso while using weights, but it's much more fun to recreate the Raiders of the Lost Ark boulder by rolling it at the cats.

Picture of the Day
You know that horrible Wayans film about a tiny jewel thief who disguises himself as a baby to recover a diamond from someone's house? Doesn't that sound really familiar? It's from an old Bugs Bunny cartoon.


I hope the cartoon folks get some royalties for that.

In the News
The new plan seems to involve Israel bombing Lebanon for another week followed by Condi Rice strolling in to play peacemaker. Israel is taking it's onw lumps for "disproportionate" force and killing as many civilans as Hezbollah militants. White House press secretary showed his ass to senior press corps member Helen Thomas by denying the U.S. vetoed a Qatar-backed U.N. resolutiuon against Isreal. He then thanked her for "the Hezbollah view" when she asked when the violence might end. I respected his credentials when he took the job, and I thought he could add a polish unseen since Ari Fleischer quit. But that's an asshole move, and he ought to apologize. The administration has tripped over itself since Israel began the attacks. Yesterday, Bush tried a casual back rub on new German chancellor Angela Merckel, and she immediately shrugged him off. This is what high-school boys do; it's a cheap grope. Christ, this guy's a loser.

iPod Person

Because I'm shipping out to Orlando in two weeks, Your Sister gave my an early birthday present, an iPod Nano. She knows I've been eyeing them for a while, and this gives me some respite from the constant musical styles at the convention with which I have little appreciation. I try, but I'm not schooled in music theory and have no context for their composition. I have what Your Sis has for comic art and films: Does it catch my fancy? No? Toodles. Yea? Groovy. The Nano is a nice little toy. I don't need a video option on as the higher iPods have, and this carries about 500 songs. That's a goodly number to commute with every day.

We had our Sunday, but there were some details you might have missed out on. On Saturday, I got up early to clear away the tangle of blackberry bushes and honeysuckle vines. I garbbed the hedge clipper and gouged away at the bushes for about 90 minutes. It was already stifling hot at 9 a.m., but when the cloud cover broke, the heat was brutal. I drank my liters of water and ferried the debris to the treeline, and at 10:20, I could do no more. I had the shakes and was goofy-headed. The next day, my back was a little tender, and even today, I'm feeling it.

Monday after work, we ran at the college as part of our communal diet and exercise. We both weigh a little more than we'd like, and luckily we don't have that much extra mass to lose. I don't think we have to change our meals drastically, just move around a lot more. I ran a full lap of the cornfield, and we might go again today. Probably not, I think as I type that last sentence. I need to mow the lawn before the Ladies Night party at our house Wednesday.

Moving Picture of the Day
The Prestige is directed by and stars the three guys who put together Batman Begins. It also features Hugh jackman. It's about dueling magicians in the 19th century. This is not to be confused with The Illusionist, a film starring Ed Norton and Paul Giamatti as dueling magicians in the 19th century. The Prestige has the superior trailer. Also, Scarlet trumps Jessica Biel.

In the News
Did you order World War III? 'Cause I didn't order it, and no one else here will claim it. I say send it back. I'd rather have World War II and a side of Norman Conquest. Maybe a 16-ounce Boxer Rebellion. On Sunday, Condi Rice dimissed any claim that we destablized the Middle East when we went into Iraq. And that's an easy stance to take considering the Middle East has never been stable to begin with. But we didn't help that any when we invaded a country to stomp out terrorism, the same rationale Israel is using to hit Lebanon. We put a giant gold star on the pre-emptive doctorine. Bush made some noise yesterday when an open mic caught him saying "shit" in regards to the Lebanon battle. But the most important matter was earlier in the sentence when he said Syria controls Hezbollah. The conservatives have tried to embroil Syriah in the war on terror since we invaded Iraq. Many claimed all the WMDs were smuggled there, and some missions in Northern Iraq came close to that country's border.

Excuse me, can you be more confusing?

Buying Tom Waits tickets for this tour is easy And when I say "easy," I mean, "hey, punch me in the liver, what say." Tickets were announced maybe a week ago for sale today. The concert is in three weeks. Just yesterday, it was announced that in there is a two-ticket limit. Not per purchase. Per customer. Ticketmaster says this: Orders associated with the same name, email, billing address, credit card, etc. may have all tickets cancelled without notice by Ticketmaster at its discretion. That means that Your Sister and I can't buy tickets using separate bank accounts because we live at the same address. I understand; this is to reduce hoarding by scalpers. But it makes buying six tickets by two people impossible. The plan initially was for Kathy, Travis, their two Ohio pals, and me to go (Your Sister can't stand Tom Waits. I learned this just this week.) The Ohio people can't order tickets because they are out of state. At least, that's what I gather from Kathy; we're so confused by this suddenly announced process that we're just happy to have what tickets we could snag. And what we were able to get is pretty far away. Look at this ...

Picture of the Day


See that circle? That's what I got by logging into Ticketmaster.com exactly at 10 a.m., when tickets went on sale. Admittedly, I got the cheaper tickets ($54 vs. $75). My Ticketmaster account is pre-established. I had to punch in virtually no personal info. I had the quickest possible ticket purchase, and this is where I'm sitting. Front row, top level, back section. That's absurd. Just an hour and 15 minutes later, there are no tickets left for sale. Look, I'm happy to be able to see him, but only if I'm able to see him. I may as well be sitting at Asheville Pizza. It's going to be a fun night, and I'll need this event to cheer my spirits just a day after the Orlando convention.

In the News
Mr. T is giving up his gold chains after spending time with Katrina victims. Kudos for feeling empathy, but unless he's going to auction those chains for charity. He's gesture makes only himself feel better and provides a blip of publicity.

Harry Potter and the Franchise I Finally Got Around to Reading

I closed the cover on the last published Harry Potter book last night. The Half-Blood Prince is big step up from Order of the Phoenix in tone and focus. Whereas Phoenix was rambling, bitter, and overlong, this last one sets up the final book (yet to be published) with our hero older, determined, and angry. It's also one big hormone quesadilla. Virtually every student hooks up with somebody, and even supporting characters are geting involved with each other. There's nothing graphic at all; no one does any more than kiss. But it's a massive shift in character distraction and activity.

The franchise is a solid read, and Rowling proves she's no flash in the pan writer as the books progress. This is an epic story told in the Hardy Boys formula, but she's discussing the effects of war on a second generation. None of the magic students, good or bad, signed up for this decisive posturing; they're inheriting it from their parents. One gets the impression that everyone involved would rather quit the business than see this to the end. The books' story is much more substantial than the movies, but the casting is spot-on.

Picture of the Day
This is brilliant. A marketing firm designed this ad to show how roomy the Mini Copper is. They positioned the picture sideways at a subway entrance.



In the News
Israel-Lebanon might get uglier. Israel has no problem attacking civilians in hopes of making the Lebanese turn against Hezbollah.

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The FDA approved Atripla, a once-a-day AIDS cocktail combining three drugs made by two companies. The pill will cost less than the individual treatments.

Gotta Be The Shoes

Your Sis was in Asheville yesterday, and we ate at Jersulaem garden. Man, I could eat lamb gyros morning, noon, and night. Sheeps is good eats. I went back to wrok while she, unknown to me, shopped for bowling shoes. I've wanted a pair of honest-to-God bowling shoes for years now, ever since I bowled with a group from the daily paper. I don't have the nerve to steal a pair from an alley. Also, Dick's Sporting Goods stopped seeling them around here. So Your Sis, armed with advice from a fellow teacher, checked out Asheville stores and found some potentials. She showed them to me after work, and I agred with all her choices. We found a pair on sale at a store in teh scary, deserted Biltmore Square Mall. Maybe it's from years of watching Dawn of the Dead, but quasi-abandoned malls give me both heebies and jeebies. As I type, I am sporting some brown Skechers bowling-style shoes. Not quite the real thing, but close enough. We also tried to find me a fedora to make a Press hat during the convention, but we can only find outdoorsman lids.

When you come by this weekend, I hope you're ready for more Katamari Damacy.

Picture of the Day
Shoe = fly. Don't bother me.


In the News
Israel entered Lebanon after Hezbollah captured two Isreali soldiers. We seem to be able to corral Israel when they are attacked, but I wonder how much we can keep them back when they're fighting on two fronts.

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The Department of Homeland Security database of likely targets determines which states get funds to ward off attacks. This equation determined why New York got less funding than states in the Midwest. The list includes donut shops, petting zoos, ice cream parlors, and tackle shops. This is retarded. The 9/11, 3/11, 7/11, and 7/7 attacks hit transportation and bureaucratic targets. The Bali attacks hit nightclubs. Israel gets hit at restaurants and buses. No one is attacking what can only be considered Americana hotspots. This has to be a list dreamed up by congressman trying to shunt money to their states. You'd think Muslim extremists would be more likely to attack the larger coastal cities with all their wild women, homosexual tolerances, and strip clubs. But, no, ice cream parlors are much more likely. Little Jenny and Peter McMayberry are in grave, grave danger from a Saudi fundamentalist with a mad-on for Dairy Queen.

Another Rocky?!

Not much to report. I'm reading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince quickly. Kathy and Travis came over for wings and rasslin. Your Sis will not join us to see Tom Waits. She mocked the man over while eating my wings. I think, in the Middle East, that's grounds for divorce.

Moving Picture of the Day
You can see the trailer for the next Rocky movie. I bet it ends exactly like the first one. This isn't a franchise the people are demanding to see again. The last film, already 15 years old, was awful, but Rocky V at least acknowledged he was aging hard; the film started with signs of neurological damage. This new film seems to ignore that. Also, I don't see no Adrian, and she was Rocky's inspiration.

Pirates of the Tempest

Pirates of the Caribbean 2 is a fuhntaztic time at the movies. We saw it Friday in a crammed Mayberry theatre. I've never seen that many people in there before, and apparently the film was just as popular all over the country. It set the highest three-day take in history with $132 million and the highest one-day take at $55 million. One has to watch the first movie or else everything is lost upon them, but this blows away the first film with smarts, stunts, and fun. I'd watch it each day for a week if I had the time. I was as casual a fan of the first Pirates as you could hope to meet, but this was converted me as a die-hard. There's not a sour note to be found. We watched the film with Kathy and Travis. Your Sis had to move twice because the Tallest Man in North Carolina sat in front of her twice. She sat, he sat. She moved, he moved. She moved again right as the film started.

On Saturday, we welcomed Penn, Andrea, Brooke, Your Parents and mine to the villa. Your Sis laid out a great pre-lunch snack of cookies and lemonade, and we took turns giving house tours. We ate at Jason's to avoid food complications. Brooke is a very well-behaved kid. She's at that age where she's happy most of the time, and she can throw out words and animal noises. She liked our cats, and they had no problem with her once she continuously fed them her Cheerios. It was a fun time. I finally gave my mom the Elvis license plate from Memphis, and she adored it as she does all things Presley. We gave your family a tour of the school after Andrea asked, and they left for Asheville around 6. We called up Kathy and Travis and had a long dinner at the pub. At 9:30, the town fireworks went off. It was a decent show for a hamlet this size. We taped the Germany-Portugal game and all watched it after the fireworks. Travis knows German and regailed us with translations of the winning team's player names. The guy who scored both goals for Germany is apparently named "pig-mounter."

Sunday, we met up with the family for brunch before sending them back to Alabama. We stayed near Asheville for some shopping. Your Sis wanted organizational gadgets for the house. We both bought new wallets. I found a cheap, cool Old navy shirt, and she ran into a school coach in Best Buy. While Travis and Kathy weren't up for it, we went to Montford Park to see The Tempest.

Picture of the Day
The play featured a black female Prospero, but happily for me, they weren't injecting a new interpretation. She was simply playing the role. That's her on the left. We got there about an hour before the show and were the first to claim seating. We carried along folding chairs, a cooler of grub, and various drinks. About 45 minutes later, we had to move. We had sat in the dead center near the top of the ampitheater, but everyone who followed sat in front of us in a column. The play wasn't bad. As with all community productions, the quality of acting will vary, sometimes wildly. Prospero was played with projection but no inflection. She was just spouting dialogue with no real feel. This is a character who exudes heft, power, and wisdom. He is the center of the play. She didn't have that. The younger actors (Ariel, the lovers, the conspirators, and Caliban) had energy, while the older ones seemed to have less experience on stage. They had little to no emotion and simply moved from mark to mark. One actor was so weak, Your Sis heaved a sigh of resignation every time he started to talk. Again, I watch these kinds of shows and want to get back on stage. It's a deep itch.



After the show, this was about 10:30, we drove home to watch Italy and France play the World Cup final. We had somehow gotten through the day without knowing who won. When I called Travis to invite them to join us, it was about 4:30, and he said they were still watching the game. I checked my TiVo and noticed it was no longer recording. The game had stretched beyond the network prgramming; the machine will by default stop recording when a show is scheduled to end. Because the final stretched into a shootout, the machine had long ago stopped taping. I turned on the TV just long enough to make it record the rest of the game and turned it right off. I knew it went to a shootout but not how the teams had initially scored. We watched the game and then jumped to the final two kicks, just in time to see Italy win. Only through replays did we see Zidane lose his shit and headbutt the Italian player. That was just as dumb as Rooney's red-card move that cost England their semifinal game. His earlier penalty kick was astounding in guts and skill, but it and his head-butt suggests a confidence that slipped into arrogance. I'm glad the Cup is done. I've feasted on soccer for a while now and can use the break.

In the news
A District Court ruled that companies cannot offer sanitized Hollywood movies as it infringes copyrights. I've been aware of this trend for about eight years now. Rental outlets try to win over customers by taking away all the violence and sex from popualr movies. The president stated about five years ago that this is how he prefers his movies. I have no problem with people using their own purchased equipment to edit movies they buy, but I agree that these companies have broken a law by selling pre-edited copies. There are some companies that will only edit what is sent to them by customers, and that's OK by me.

Tom Waits for No Man

The weekend is becoming a little more complicated. Your borhter and Andrea are here in Asheville today, and everybody is coming to our house Saturday for lunch. Actually, we're going out, and that causes two hiccups. First, Your Sis and I talked about taking Penn and Andrea to the local seafood place. But, now that will include everyone, including my parents. But my mom can't eat seafood. It's deathly bad. I called the restaurant and they assured me they clean each piece of cookery between prepared meals. If that's the be belived, we have the second concern: Your dad and soy. The fish place says they use canola oil, but that doesn't cover the use of soy in individual dishes or salad oils. My suggestion is that we go to Jason's. We know everyone can find something there to eat.

We haven't done anything with our garden in a while, and it was overgrown with weeds that towers over me. I thought about wacking everyhing down after work yesterday. I got home to find that Heidi had cleared it all away with power tools. That's so hot. We have a little work to do in cleaning up the place before tomorrow, but it won't take long.

I heard on the radio today that Tom Waits is playing Asheville in August. This is as unlikely an event as finding the planet Saturn in your fridge. We are going. It might be a small mob of us, but I don't think Your Sis will come. She doesn't know the man's work.

Moving Picture of the Day

"Rapper's Delight."

In the news
National Geographic is reporting on the effort to identify the remains of Noah's Ark. One group claims a mountain rock outcropping is made of petrified wood. Others say the rock is normal sedimentary material. The debate is really about science vs. Creation. If this is Noah's Ark, and it can be cardbon-dated to a few thousand years ago, its small size will suggest post-flood animal life had to be the work of God. A big boat on the mountain would be enough for some to prove that Genesis stories are historical documents and not myths. Finding a big boat on a mountain doesn't mean it's related to Noah. I've heard of this effort since I was very young. It popped up in tabloids and on "In Search Of." This is similar to the to-do over the Shroud of Turin. Even if the shroud is 2,000 years old, and even if it is the burial cloth of a crucified man, that still doesn't mean it was used on Jesus. If their faith is really faith, the existence of artifacts or their absence shouldn't in any way affect their belief. Faith is distinct from knowledge. These efforts are undertaken to convert the heathens, and to them I ask that they just hand over my financial share of all their efforts. If this is done on my behalf, I'd rather they buy me a CD, not a rotten pontoon in avalanche territory.

Bachelored Once More

Your Sis called to say it was a Girl's Night, and she would be out for a while. I grabbed a burger and hunkered down in the workshop. A teacher pal of hers has asked for two mix CDs, one for "rambling" tunes and the other for mashups. The latter is easier; I just made that for Travis. But the rambling songs are taking a while. I originally had 60 potential songs -- everything from Mojo Nixon's "Are You Drinking With Me Jesus" to Radiohead's cover of "Rhinestone Cowboy" to the "Dukes of Hazzard" theme song. I've managed to whittle them down to 25, but I need to cut about 5 of them to fit on a CD. I don't want to give her a double CD. That's overkill.

Picture of the Day

The Snakes on a Plane marketing is just wrong. The ads and the poster should be campy throwbacks. The subdued modern style has no fun at all. The poster should look like the below example. It needs expository text, dramatic foreshortening, and fucking snakes.





In the news
The Emmy nominations are out. Neither the best drama nor best comedy series from last year are up for those awards this year. "Lost" is up for writing, directing and guest actor for Desmond, a second-season character. I imagine the show's designed confusion alienated voters. Marton Sheen is up for best leading actor for "West Wing," a series that moved away from the White House staff. I'm not sure how he qualifies given that the actor playing Josh clearly carried the show this year. The CJ Craigg actress got a leading actor nod too, a nomination she deserved more last year. Also Hugh Laurie is not up for his role in "House," and that's a bit of a shock.

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The top New York court ruled that gay marriages are not allowed by state law. Unlike the Massachussetts ruling, the court did not rule the state marriage law as exclusionary.

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Superman Returns

... is a movie taking wrong turns. They got a good actor to resemble Reeve, and a good Luthor in Spacey, but they took an angle on the Superman myths that lacks energy and, worse, humanity. We're left with an odd detachment from the Man of Steel. It's a little sad. They spent a whole buncha money on great effects and prodcution design without hammering out a Superman movie that closes with a sense of happiness, security, or hope. I pray that the obligatory extended DVD version is a better film. But, hey, I got to hear the John Williams "Superman" theme through movie speakers a few times, and that was well worth the money.

We arrived for the 12:15 showing and nabbed some great seats wih our armloads of food. When the movie started, we couldn't help but be distracted by the closed captioning on the screen. Turns out, this theatre runs captions on every first showing of each film on Tuesdays. Nowhere does the theatre tell you that. Not when you buy the tickets, not when they rip the tickets. Not when you buy food or enter the theatre. Your Sis learned that they would exchange our 12:15 tickets for the 12:45 showing, sans captions. So we did. As did about a third of the 12:15 audience.

After the film, we wolfed down doughnuts and coffee at Krispy Kreme (it fit the Superman song: duh-duhnuh-nuhnuh ... KRISPY KREME!) and walked through Home Depot. we're thinking of wall colors and took a dozen paint samples for consideration. We had dinner with Travis while Brevard was smothered by a thunderstorm that washed out the big fireworks show.

Moving Pictures of the Day
If you click this link and scroll down to the video features, you can watch the shuttle launch from an exterior mounted camera. It's very cool.

In the news
So, um, yeah, North Korea fired seven missiles that failed their distance capacity, and NOW we're supposed to pay attention to them? Does this give the GOP a rallying cry for November? I doubt it since they have focused solely on a "war on terror," and while that country was in the original Axis of Evil, we thrown much un-axis-ing their way like we have toward the Middle East. Iran may have nuclear material, but North Korea has missiles. Who do you squash? Both? Really, with our military stretched thin? Doesn't make sense. Until they actually hit Japan, all we can do is ask them not to use basic rocket technology. Next month, we'll ask Russia to give up the telephone.

Bachelor Time

We attended a farewell party of a departing teacher Friday night. I chugged most of a six-pack of Woodchuck Granny Apple Cider and devoured the buffet. On Saturday, Your Sis attended a wedding in Rosman, leaving me to myself for most of the day. I witnessed Rooney and Beckham decimate their own team, allowing Portugal to win on penalty kicks. I also saw an aggressive French team beat Brazil. I'm shocked by the amount to flopping in the World Cup. Even professional basketball doesn't have this kind of bald-faced lying. One Portgual player grabbed his head and crumpled to the ground midfield when the replay shoed he was never touched. That should be penalized. The Portugese fans were booing the England team for continuing play, and I can't blame England; who could tell if someone was really hurt or trying to kill momentum?

Later that night, we went to the Averrettes'. Paul was the one who officiated our wedding. It was the four of us and another older couple, friends of the Paul and Polly. Your Sis and I tried to jump into conversations, but so much of it dealt on friendly injokes, reminiscing, and children stories. We just didn't have that much in common. It wasn't a bad time at all, but I'm already handicapped by stories of school. All of our social time is spent with teachers, and I can offer very little. I think this may be why Travis wants to teach.

On Sunday, she went to Greenville to visit a Furman pal, and I had the place to myself again. I watched the director/writer commentary of Sin City. I got to hear Frank Miller, the guy who created the comic, talk about bringing the stories to life while learning to direct at the same time. Because Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriquez are such close directing buddies, the latter used Kill Bill weaponry for Sin City. I got my montly comic haul from my old store and plowed through them all day. I also drew a bit, gathering momentum on my comic stories again. I cracked open the most recent Harry Potter book. When I finish this, I'll be caught up with the series. Whenever I find myself alone, I always stay up much later, and I hit the bed about 1 a.m.
I got your medical essay, and we'll both work on it this week.

Picture of the Day


I'm nervous about the shuttle launch. It's no secret that the underfunded NASA needs a new spaceship, and I don't see the virtue of launching a rickety, outdated vehicle when its safety is debateable. Yes, yes, let's be pioneers, and let's embrace a degree of risk. But let's give the astronauts a decent, resuable craft. The PC I'm typing with has more horsepower than the shuttle's main computer. When they launch and return, these are the most visible scientists on the planet. Let's give them more than the equivalent of a 1988 Volvo to pin our exploratory dreams on. Five shuttles have been built. Two have exploded. That's a shitty track record.

In the news
According to Bloomberg News, the administration contacted AT&T about a domestic wiretapping program before 9/11. This is counter to the White House timeline of events. If you recall, the pre-9/11 White House focus was on Russia and a missile shield. Maybe they can claim we were tracking nuclear warhead smugglers.

Reunited, and it drives so good.

The car works again. While the idle isn't as smooth as I'd like, it's nowhere near as bad as it had been. Also the gear indicator is fixed. We had a pub dinner last night before heading to the forest edge for ice cream. We ran into one of my college drama professors, and we caught up on what's happened since graduation. He mentioned that the college auditions are open to the public, and this is my chance to get my stage legs back. The first potential play is by Edward Albee, and I'm all over that opportunity. I'll be the oldest guy. I can play a dad. If this is typical Albee, it will be a drunk, yuppie dad. We watched a documentary on Superman, and now I'm dying to see the film. Both yesteray and today started with a communal breakfast while waiting for the dealership to call. We never have breakfast together as we rarely awake at the same time. But this was nice. We read papers and ate baked goods. Your Sister's good to hang out with. Glad I married her.

Picture of the Day
I already miss the beard.


In the news
The Supreme Court ruling on Guantanamo detainees only applies to those charged before Congress's 2005 Detainee Treatment Act. Still, it may be the first major step in restraining the growing executive powers. The conservative slant on this is to again cite "activist judges," as if that invented outrage can carry the November elections.

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They're making a Transformers movie. I have no interest in this. My geek bubble only extends so far.

Doggone

Woke up this morning to learn that, while walking the puppy, Your Sister met its owner. The dog went crazy with joy when it saw the man, so it was obviously his. So that's that.

I learned last night that Andrea and P2 won't be coming up this weekend, but will instead plan the trip around his planned seminars in Fayetteville. Maybe next weekend. This frees up Your Sis to see her college buddy in Greenville Sunday and into Monday. I shall stay home and draw. And booze it up.

The dealership said they got the wrong part and won't be able to fix my car until tomorrow morning. The boss has been good about me coming in late today and tomorrow. If they don't give me my car tomorrow, I'm demanding a loaner for the weekend. As I drove Your Sister's car to work, I saw a "Lost Dog" flyer describing the dog we handed over. Her name was Misha. The guy didn't tell us. I have no doubts he was the real owner, but he didn't offer anything for housing the dog he lost. A dog with no tags, no less. He's asking for that pooch to skedaddle again

Picture of the Day
Okily dokily.



In the news
The Supremes ruled 5-3 that the administration cannot deprive the Guantanamo inmates of full civil trials. This leads to a question of whether they are truly military detainees or regular prisoners. Also, it establishes that, despite administration assurances, they do indeed receive full Geneva Convention rights. Dissenting court opinion suggests the government will be hampered in seeking justice, but that assumes there is insufficient evidence to prosecute in a courtroom. If there is not enough evidence, what rationale is there for the incarcerations? The court effectively told the administration to either prove they belong locked up or release them. This is a conservative court, recently filled with two Bush appointees. Roberts excused himself from ruling because he worked the case on the appeal level.

Spidey!

It's a day of hope: The puppy will go to a animal foster home tomorrow, and the dealership is supposed to call me tonight to give me back the car. We still don't know what this weekend looks like with your family. We haven't heard the plans for Penn2 and Andrea, and I don't know what day I have off for July 4, if any. The boss has been in and out of the office with a family reunion shindig since Friday. I have no idea when I can see the Superman film before Tuesday. And it kills me.

Pictures of the Day
The Cowboy


The teaser trailer for Spider-Man 3 was released online yesterday, and it looks fabulous.



In the news
A bill for a flag-burning amendment failed in the Senate by one vote. This bill was all show. It would only allow Congress to later make the act criminal if it chose.

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House GOPers are trying to pass a bill condemning the NY Times for its article on financial wiretapping. This is yet another attempt to find a rallying position for the November elections. You don't kill the messenger. If someone in the government is leaking classified info, you blame them, not the papers. I suspect the administration wants such articles printed so it gives them something to rail against and appease the loyalists. If there are this many leaks and no one is getting fired for it, maybe the leaks have White House approval.

24 Hours of Turmoil

Ever since I got my car from my parents (they bought a new one), it has idled hard. Once you drive off, it's golden. But at red lights it shakes something awful. Yesterday, I heard a large engine rattle as I arrived at work. As I cranked it up after work, the rattle was much louder. I popped the hood, thinking maybe a screw had come loose during the recent inspection. Whatever was making the noise was deep in the engine. I drove it home despite awful shuddering and racket at red lights. I called Your Sis to warn her I may need a pick-up, but she wasn't answering her cell of the home phone. This didn't make me happy. We bought cell phones specifically for this contingency.

I arrived home and saw her standing next door. I strolled around the house, pretty mad, for about half an hour and then walked over. Heidi was holding a dog's leash. Little dog. Obviously a puppy, but it was also obviously going to be a big dog. What I gleaned from the conversation was that the dog had walked into our yard sporting no tags. It was a new stray, and the local foster-animal residential folks couldn't take it. Since Heidi found it, we're taking care of it. We borrowed a dog cage from the foster people, and they gave us some used chew stuff for it to play with. It stayed with us in the garage last night. It's a fantastic dog -- well trained and quiet -- but it can't be older than six months. Not only did it not make a peep last night, it didn't pee its cage. If we had a decent backyard to hold it, I'd claim this dog in a heartbeat.

Kathy and Travis came over for wings last night. As I was making the "found dog" signs, Your Sis made the wings. Incorrectly. Instead of flour, she coated them with oat bran. They didn't taste so bad, but they were clearly oatmealish. And I worry what buffalo oatmeal will do to my tummy.

I knew I had to take the car to the dealership this morning for repairs, but it only got a mile before it died. The battery's fine, the brakes are fine, but the idle is shot. I called Triple A for a tow and then Your Sis for a heads-up. After 45 minutes, the tow truck didn't arrive. After another thirty, it didn't arrive. Triple A called me back twice to confirm the truck showed up, and it finally arrived as I talked to them the second time. They towed the car off to the shop, and I took Your Sister's car to work. The dealership called me about an hour later to give me the diagnostic and the estimate. It's not as bad as I feared. I can get it tomorrow night, hopefully, and the idle problem will be no more. Maybe.

Pictures of the Day
This is the dog.



This is me after the first shave Saturday. The sideburns are no longer with us.



In the news
About three months after he avoided prison with a plea deal about prescription shopping, Rush Limbaugh was detained at a Florida airport for carrying Viagra without a prescription. Idiot. Worse, he was carrying it back into the country from the Dominican Republic.

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Palestine's Hamas-Fatah government may recognize Israel.

Shavespeare

Kathy and Travis decided not to drive to H'ville for German food, and we ate instead at a local steakhouse. That's fine by me. A good time was had by all. We adjourned to Jason's for dessert and began a lengthy talk about religion. We established no new beachheads but refined our positions better and walked away much later content with the conversation. These are good people, and I enjoy their company a great deal.

Saturday marked the beginning of horrible weather, and that knocked us out of seeing The Tempest at Montford Park. Your Sis asked that I shave so she could see me sans beard but with the short haircut and the new glasses. Before we had lunch, I was shorn, as this week's Pictures of the Day will document. We hit the pub for lunch and discussed our potential August honeymoon. We talked about Chicago, but we both expressed concerns about pulling it together on such short notice. There's also the matter of the necessary chunk of change. I promised to leaf through our Chicago tour books to find the best destinations.

Back home, she reminded me that her sink was borken, and I looked at it. The knob that controls the stopper was broken. I had never fixed a sink before and didn't know what the repair would entail. Off to Lowe's I went and found me a stopper kit to fix it. About 20 minutes later, I had done the deed. It was a cinch, and I didn't have to drain any pipes. I feel so competent. So manly. Had I retained the beard before the repair, I could have been the new Bounty mascot. She took off with Julie, who's getting married next weekend, and they were gone for about seven hours. I sketched a bit and watched the Ebert commentary on the Casablanca DVD. I love that man. He not only knows his stuff, he can communicate it in an interesting way.

The next day, I woke up early to catch England vs. Ecudaor and finally saw Beckham play. he scored the only goal, and it was a soaring beaut. I found a pamphlet from a Virginia Shakespeare playhouse and discovered their August offerings were tempting: Macbeth, As You Like It, and Tempest. We decided this is where we can go for our honeymoon: Shakespeare and bed-and-breakfasts. We are geeks. We watched The Merchant of Venice last night, and having never read the play, I found it a dour, mean-spirited story. I can't tell if it's supposed to signify the effects of crafty women on men, generational wars, or the crippling formality of men. Al Pacino owns the film as Shylock. There's really no other reason to watch the movie.

Picture of the Day
The pre-shave.


In the news
Remember when the GOP slammed the Democrats for suggesting we craft a time-table to withdraw from Iraq? Turns out the Pentagon's top general has done just that. Also, the prime minister of Iraq proposed a program to grant amnesty to insurgents, distinguishing them from terrorists, if they promise to rebuild the city. Guess how happy this makes our administration. This will strain the notion of a "free Iraq," but it's a needed step. He's lives there. He's nominally in charge. He has to try something to end the violence seeing as how we can't.

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UNC might win the College World Weries tonight agaist Oregon State.

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The Florida terrorists arrested last week may instead be a pack of restless twerps with no training, no weapons, no money, and no plot. The question now is this: Were they set up as a big arrest by an undercover agent who directed them to a jihadist stance?

Star Trek stuff

No update yesterday as I was swamped in work meetings all day. I learned my high school chum Esther had a baby, her first. A boy. My other pal from that time, Rebecca, is due to get married next June. You might remember Esther and her family from my wedding; she was the photography wrangler, making sure we got all the pictures we wanted.

After work, I ran my frustrations out with a good session at the gym. Our buddies Travis and Kathy are celebrateing their fifth anniversary tonight at a German restaurant in Hendersonville, and we're invited along. I haven't had real German food before, and I'm eager for the nosh.

Your Sis and I have made a recent habit of watching "Star Trek: The Next Generation," only because we hit a string of decent episodes. Once the channel loops back to the series' first seasons, we'll bail; those early ones are embarrassing to watch as the producers didn't have a strong grasp of the series. We did end the night on a strangely dumb episode built around a murder mystery; we noted the flaws in the logic and the avoidance of simple regular show elements that could have solved the matter quickly. For instance, how do you perform an autopsy on an alien without cutting him open? Move him using the transporter. It employs a diagnostic and quarantine for foreign particles. How can you tell who was in the room with a dead person? Ask the ship's ever-vigilant computer. Also, Whoopi Goldberg's character doesn't hold up well. She's too similar to the counselor empath, and that hat will never look anything other than absurd. Credit the regular cast for holding up their end while working with her. She's an Oscar-winner and a born performer wheras the NG cast didn't have much oncamera experience.

Picture of the Day
Apparently a real poster. Can't say it's all that effective.



In the news
Federal agents captured a group in Florida who were planning attacks there and in Chicago. Details are still coming in.

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A casting rumor says the Star Trek movie reboot might get Matt Damon for Kirk. This idea would be more mind-blowing had Your Sis and I not already picked him last year. We decided to recast the original crew for a new film, and we came up with this:

Matt Damon as Kirk
Denzel Washington as Spock
Gary Senise as Bones
Lucy Liu as Sulu
Angela Bassett as Uhuru.
Mandy Patinkin as Scotty
Famke Jansen as Chekov, based on her accent in Goldeneye. I dunno about changing the gender of two bridge crewmembers. I say they can get any current male teen heartthrob for the role.

We're also working on recasting Star Wars.

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Ebert doesn't like Adam Sandler's Click