Letters to Holly

Friday, June 9

Step Right Inside, Stupid People

I work on the second floor of a building with two main doors. The front door faces Tunnel Road and is always locked for three reasons:

1) We don’t want salesmen.

2) We don’t want vagrants.

3) We don’t want people looking for the old real estate office.

The realtors moved out in Nov. 2005, but we still get people trying to rent a house. The other door is in the back of the building, next to the parking lots. This is the entrance we employees use. Some people looking for the realtors are so determined that they go around to this back door. Now, one must remember that in getting to that door, they missed the giant yellow sign for our organization and the lack of a large two-story red sign for the realtors. They also missed the organization crest above the front door and the completely new landscaping we’ve put down.

Still, they come in the back door. This door leads to a small room where one finds a door and a staircase. What do they all do? They go up the stairs to where I, and now a new lady, work. They will roam the halls until they find someone. This has happened to me a lot. It happened again yesterday morning. But it wasn’t someone looking for the realtors. It was a vagrant.

This old guy – raggedy and shuffling – found the new lady. I heard her trying to figure out what he wanted and hopefully lead him out the door. I walked up and asked what was happening. She immediately thanked me. The guy is holding what looks like a check card and mumbling about food stamps. Now I doubt he’s lucid, and I’m not so much asking him as suggesting to him what he might be doing. I’m leading him to tell us what he really wants, not what he claims to look for. He says he wants to use the card to call a number to get food stamps. He’s not using our phones for this. I ask him if he has quarters to call from a payphone, and I show him that I have some to give. Before he can ask, I ask to see the number. It’s an 800 number, so he doesn’t need quarters. Back in the pocket they go. I then direct him across the street to the Greyhound station where they surely have a payphone (and if not, I don’t care).

I also note that the card features the signature of “Angela B.” on the back. This is not his card. He could received it from her, found a lost card, or stolen it. I probably should have pressed him on it, but I didn’t care. It’s my responsibility now to move him along, not bust him. Plus, he’s obviously looking for some sort of currency (even if he didn’t realize he could have lied about the number and taken my quarters). I won’t get between a desperate man and access to money. This mystery isn’t worth it to me to solve. Besides, unless Angela also wrote her PIN on the card, he can’t use it for anything, and he’ll discover that soon. I escorted him out the door and told the downstairs people what happened. I have asked for a while now that we label the downstairs interior door with an “OFFICE” sign so people won’t come up the staircase. Unless they walk by my office, or now hers, we can’t hear them, and they can wander or hide for hours, maybe until we close. Downstairs, vistors would open that door and immediately encounter occupied offices.

This kind of wandering happened in my old paper offices. Vagrants would walk in and ask for money or work. We would deny them, shoo them off, and lock the back door for a while. There’s no need to be mean. Just quickly and gently eject them from where they ain’t supposed to be.

And about three hours after I typed this, someone came in looking for the realtors. Two in one day, if you can believe it. The boss called after they left to say we’re now locking the back door. And if anyone does manage to sneak in, we call the cops.

Your Sis and I grabbed a pub dinner and had a nice long conversation with an outside meal. Her brains are scrambled from the effort to close shop before next week. While we watched the Dallas-Miami game, I helped her check off marks on the final research papers. We finished up around midnight, and I can already tell she's ready for summer, because she never stays up that late.

Tomorrow is our one-year anniversary as spouses and homeowners. It's been a busy year, and while most of it has flown by, I do get the sense of the year's passage. Still, it's been a very easy year with her, and I can easily handle doing this for another 49, if possible. We're not giving each other presents, but we are saving the money for a real and true honeymoon. Your Sis is a doll and a peach of a wife. I'm extremely lucky she didn't trust anyone else enough to marry them.

My obsession with the 1986 horror film From Beyond is so overwheleming that I bought a recent back issue of a Candaian magazine featuring a cover story on the movie. I saw it solicited in a monthly comic catalog and tracked it down online. This film strayed across my path when I was an impressionable teen, and part of my brain imprinted on it. It's total schlock, and something of a relic -- true monster movies are rare these days. I also have a press packet for the film and a late '80s Belgian poster hanging in my workshop. Allegedly, a domestic DVD is coming out soon. It was put onto DVD in Germany two years ago which does my Region I player and incompatible TV (NTSC vs PAL format) no good.

Picture of the Day
You saw X3 and watched Kitty fight on the team, but did you know what her costume really looks like?


That's right, she's kinda punky. It goes with her confounding ballet-ninja skills. For the longest time, she followed Wolverine around, as Rogue does in the first X-Men film. And she always had a thing for Colossus, the steel-armor X-Man.

Thursday, June 8

It's Only Thursday?

Your Sister wrapped up the official school year yesterday, but she still hs work to do. Grades are due tomorrow at noon, but since the majority of teachers never meet that deadline, she probably has until Tuesday to finish. There is remediation today and tomorrow for kids who failed their state exams. Remediation is hell. Teachers review the class for five hours and then give the test for another two. No matter how many kids are there. She's done this before for one kid. One. Seven hours of the same subject is enough to befuddle a genius, but a kid taking a make-up exam when everyone else is out of school? That's pressure I will gladly live without.

I made din-din last night: lemon-garlic-pepper chicken alfredo with sauteed red pepper. It's easy to make with a gas broiler.

I received word this week that a comic anthology I submitted a short story to will publish this Halloween. Given that I turned it in last August (on two week's notice) for last Halloween, I'll believe it when I see it. I rushed the art and wish I had known I had a full year to improve it.

Picture of the Day
My proposed cover for the next Pan Pipes. It's a desktop statue of the Three Graces we have on the second floor.



In the news
We got al-Zarqawi last night. But immediately we heard that this will not drastically reduce the insurgency in Iraq.

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Despite virtually no country radio airplay, the Dixie Chicks have the top CD in the country for the second consecutive week. Country radio is apprently run my ferrets, because this happens a lot. Johnny Cash and Loretta Lynn had recent No. 1 CDs with nary a tune played on a country station. They did, however, play on rock stations because of producers Rick Rubin and Jack White, respectively. I'm no fan of country music in general. I like some folks (Alan Jackson, George Strait) but I grew up listening to '70s AM radio county, tunes that were designed to get you laid or depressed. The modern country stuff, by and large, is audio wallpaper for a daily commute. The Chicks also worked with Rubin, which allows some stations and anti-Chicker to claim the CD is bought by rock fans and Bush-haters, not real country fans. But it should be noted that it's killing the latest Toby Keith CD in sales.

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A note about why I love theatre: This if from today's New York Times.

"The Pajama Game" became a waiting game last night when a minor accident injured a cast member and caused a 27-minute interruption in the performance.

To calm the restless audience in the American Airlines Theater, Harry Connick Jr., who plays the lead character, Sid, conducted a question-and-answer session, sang "Happy Birthday" to someone in the audience and talked about the future of his native New Orleans and his high school career.

The interruption came during an office scene, right before the song "I'll Never Be Jealous Again," when two desks moving onto the stage collided. Roz Ryan, who plays Mabel, was sitting in a chair behind one of them and was slightly injured.

According to a spokesman for the show, one of the chains that moves the scenery broke. As the curtain came down and the staff worked to patch it, Mr. Connick stepped onto the stage, shedding the flat Midwestern accent of his character for his native New Orleans lilt.

Finally, the conductor signaled him. "Harry, it's time." The show started back up, with Ms. Ryan continuing in her role, right where it had left off.

Tuesday, June 6

About the Batwoman debate ...

About a week ago, the New York Times unleashed an article about DC Comics' effort to make their cast resemble minority demographics. The new Blue Beetle is a Latino teen. China has a team of superpeople. And the company is dusting off Batwoman and giving the name to an already established gay woman. The conservative news outlets saw this and went apeshit. There is some confusion about what DC is doing here.

First, of course, it's a marketing ploy. DC is trying to get buzz by pushing their first mainstream gay character and making her part of the Batfranchise. Now, they've had gay characters before. The Vertigo wing of DC is geared toward an older, more literate audience and has included gay characters now for about 20 years. Also, another DC wing printed a comic with very obvious copies of Superman and Batman involved in a gay relationship. Eventually though, DC squashed the clear depictions of their affection, much to the chagrin of the writers. Marvel Comics, the competitor, has also featured gay characters for about a decade now, some within the mighty X-franchise. When the company recently decided to court mainstream audiences, they reimagined an older Western character called Rawhide Kid in a winking, gay miniseries. And independent comics have gay characters all over the place. Much like network TV, comic publishers they can catch eyes if they toss in a wacky gay character or use one to add pathos for dramatic effect.

Second, this isn't BatGIRL. This is BatWOMAN. Batwoman was never a mainstream character. The redhead in the 1960s TV show, the female cartoon character incarnations, and Alicia Silverstone were all Batgirl. She's a female Robin. Batwoman was the intermediary between Batman and Catwoman. Many outlets are confusing the two female characters, and its understandable. Comics often call any female spinoff character a "girl."

But the most egregious confusion lies in the constant comparison of comics to the 1960s Batman TV show. Inside the comic community, this is as outdated a standard as you can find. That version of Batman hasn't been seen in a DC comic since the 1970s, when the company purposefully veered away from that TV depiction to return the Caped Crusader to his roots as a spooky scourge of villainy. That show has done more to create expectations of comics than any other adaptation, and it's obsolete in every way. Whenever a newspaper runs an article on modern comics, they take the stance that "comics aren't for kids anymore" and add POW! BOFF! effects in the headlines. It's lazy writing. It's been done for decades. Even when I submitted an article for the daily newspaper about an upcoming convention, they used the sound effects in the headline. Even after I asked them not to. And I worked there at the time.

Anyway, the conservative indignants try to rouse their rabble by saying comics are supposed to be like the Batman TV show. They then say DC is deliberately steering their books in a more mature, amoral direction, and then they of course assume comics are only read by eight-year-olds. DC then sounds like they've decided to peddle smut to your little angels. Just not so. Mainstream comics in general have gotten much darker, much more adult and graphic over the years. It's the nature of the pulp media. Add to that the growing readership that's college age or older. The indusrty wrings its hands every few months as it tries to figure out a way to win over some of those eight-year-olds. But they're too busy playing video games.

Me, I don't care about the debate for two reasons. First, there's no need for a Batwoman. There's already Batman, Robin, Nightwing (the first Robin) , Batgirl, Oracle (the first Batgirl), and Huntress, who's Batwoman in everything but the name. What does Batwoman bring to the table? Nothing new, except her interest in women. Now I haven't read the new Batwoman comic. No one has. But I like a simple approach to franchises, and the Bat-umbrella already has too many people underneath it.

The other reason why I don't care? I've read gay characters in comics for years now. While I like seeing new takes on stock characters, I've never said "yes, that's an interesting gay woman, but she needs some outrageously large ears and a cape to be a fully developed character." I'm not calling for a boycott. I just don't have any interest in buying the comic. The general online geek reaction is a big shrugged shoulder. It's yet anotehr Bat-character, and she's gimmicked as a lesbian. No one sees this as anything than a marketing ploy.

We watched two hours of "House" last night. It's becoming a favorite show, a testament to the writing and acting. The characters rarely leave the hospital, so it ain't the vistas luring us to the show. We learned that my parents will not make it this weekend to visit, but it's for the best. Your Sister realized just yesterday that graduation is Saturday. She wouldn't be able to do anything with them if they had driven up. But this means the annual post-graduation teacher party is a few days away. That's always fun. Your dad came by the office to drop off some Africa souvenirs. He also invited us to go back with them next year. This is something to discuss at home; we don't think we can mange a Chicago trip this summer and Africa the next.

Picture of the Day
This comes out on June 19, and we're definitely catching it. It looks great.

Devil Day

Travis is dyingdyingdying to see the new Omen film.Your Sister is trying to pir us up to see it as a "man-date." I like horror films. He likes horror films. We both saw The Exorcism of Emily Rose last year, but I hear bad things about this new film. And, dammit, the original holds up. There's no need for a new Omen.

I finally made it back to the gym for what I believe was one of my best workouts. I did the bike, the treadmill, the weights, and the tummy machine. The machines tell me I lost at least 250 calories, which I promptly put back on with wings, fries, and beer. I hope to go back on Wednesday, and maybe after, I'll eat better.

Picture of the Day
This is what Earth looks like on Mars.



In the news
The Senate debates the gay-marriage-ban amendment and debates if it should debate the gay-marriage-ban amendment. Bush dusted off the "activist judges" catchphrase to explain why the Republican Party is supporting a federal action to overrule state referendums. This is the party of states' rights and smaller government, remember. It's a waste of time that could be used to accomplish something truly necessary. Why am I against the amendment and for the rights of gays to marry? My simple notions:

1) There's no reason why a taxpaying adult with no criminal record should be banned from access to a state license such as a wedding permit.
2) Wanna boost state finances? Allowing gay folks to marry means they buy wedding licenses and boost local economies with weddings.
3) Marriage is a purely civil concern. It's the incorporation of two separate entities into a joint venture. Gender only becomes a concern to those who think marriage is a) divinely established; or b) designed purely to sire children.
4) Since when does the Constitution list amendments against individual rights?
5) Why not make adultery and divorce illegal if the security of marriage as a social structure is endangered?
6) The "slippery slope" argument is easily countered. Some say this means a group of people could then get married. To them I say, that's OK. Let them. Others say it will mean adults will try to marry children. To that, let's point to the various ages at which one can marry. In Kansas, as recently as two years ago, 12-year-olds could marry. Some say it will mean people will try to marry animals. But the license can't be binding unless you can prove the animals can sign his name or affirm consent of the vows. We're talking about consenting adults entering into a union of loyalty, support, and shared possessions. Love is a nice notion, but love can't be madanted, proven, or sanctioned by the state.

There's no reason to have this debate now unless it's to distract from the real national matters at hand: security, energy, diplomacy. I live my life gleefully bereft of the concern as to what my neighbors do in their homes. As long as they aren't harming children and making bombs, it's really not my business. It's not anyone's.